


Time Hop

by maggs689



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Adam Being an Idiot in Particular, Back to the Future References, Baking as Romantic Gesture, Idiots in Love, M/M, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-10-01 21:54:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20417252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maggs689/pseuds/maggs689
Summary: Adam is visited by a future version of himself, who has a cryptic warning for him. Hi-jinks ensue!





	Time Hop

Adam from the future visited Adam on a Tuesday.

Ok, _ rewind_. An explanation.

It was March 2016 and Adam was at home playing video games by himself. He had a day off but he spent most of it lounging around the condo. The season was more than halfway over and he could feel the fatigue already settling into his bones. 

He was feeling sleepy so when reached the end of the level, he saved the game and tossed the controller onto the ottoman in front of the couch. He slumped back against the couch cushions and pulled the throw blanket over himself, settling in for a nap. 

His eyes were just falling shut when there was a loud crack from across the room. Adam snapped his eyes open and was astounded to see a shimmer in the air that materialized into-

Could that be-

It couldn’t-

It was him. He looked older, with some gray in his beard and lines around his eyes. But it was him. 

“Oh good, I’m home,” the man said.

“What the fuck!” Adam yelled, vaulting over the couch and immediately stumbling over the suitcase he had left in the middle of the floor at the end of the most recent roadie. He scrambled to his feet and started to run toward the bedroom when the man grabbed his arm.

“Relax,” the man said, sounding way too reasonable for a home invader. “Don’t get the bat from under our bed and hit me with it. Please.”

Adam turned to look at the man. “Who the fuck are you?”

“I’m you. From the future,” Future Adam said with a smile.

“Wha...how? What the fuck is happening?” Adam said, looking down to where Future Adam’s identical hand had a tight grip on his arm. 

“Here, sit,” Future Adam said, leading him to the couch. “Do you want a beer?” He was already moving to the kitchen and opening the fridge. “Oh, I forgot how shitty our taste in beer used to be.” He grabbed two bottles, fished the bottle opener out of the drawer next to the fridge, and came back to sit on the couch next to Adam.

“What kind of beer do I drink in the future?” Adam asked, his head spinning. 

“We drink scotch in the future, like grownups,” Future Adam said, clinking the neck of his beer bottle against Adam’s. 

“I’m a grownup,” Adam said defensively.

“No, you're not,” Future Adam said, shaking his head like he was placating a toddler. “You ran out of toilet paper and used coffee filters instead for a week. You only know how to cook pasta and scrambled eggs. You haven’t learned how to clean the jizz off this couch cushion.” Future Adam stood up and lifted the cushion he was sitting on, exposing the stain Adam thought he had hidden by flipping it over.

“How did you know about that?” Adam yelped.

Future Adam ignored this question. “What day is it?”

“March 2nd,” Adam said.

Future Adam sighed and rolled his eyes. “What year? _ What year_?” he said impatiently.

“2016.” 

“Oh shit,” Future Adam groaned and set his beer down on the table. “I’m too early. You haven’t even met him yet.” He started walking toward the front door.

“Where are you going?” Adam demanded.

“I gotta come back later,” Future Adam said with a wave of his hand and then the air around him shimmered and he winked out of sight.

Adam stayed frozen where he was on the couch, uncertain what just happened. After a moment, he leapt up and ran to the front door. He pulled the door open and stared out at the street, watching the cars go by as if everything was normal. 

Eventually he went back inside. When he turned on the news, everything seemed normal. No paranormal sightings or rifts in the time-space continuum. After a while, Adam started to think that he fell asleep and had a vivid dream, that he hadn’t been getting enough sleep lately and the season was starting to catch up to him. But then he saw the two bottles of beer on the coffee table and remembered how real the older version of himself had looked standing in his living room.

***

A month later, he met Brandon. 

There were only three games left in the season so Adam didn’t pay Brandon, an undrafted nobody who had just finished college, any notice. 

***

Adam went back home to Calgary for the summer and didn’t think about his future self any thought. Except for one night, after he had a few too many with his brother, he wandered down to the lake and thought about that strange afternoon in March. He took off his shoes and waded into the lake, letting the cold water lap around his knees. Maybe it had been a vivid dream, but Adam was amazed by how perfectly aged he had looked. His hair was grown out a little bit, his body a little thicker through the middle, his clothes expensive and stylish - exactly how Adam expected he would look at 40 when he was retired from hockey. The mind could play incredible tricks.

***

Future Adam reappeared almost a year later. He said he’d be back.

“Fuck!” Adam screamed at the loud crack in the hallway outside his bathroom. He startled so badly that he cut himself shaving. He rushed out into the hallway, his face half-covered in shaving cream and dripping blood, and found the older version of himself standing there, the shimmer just fading from around him like an aura.

“What’s the date?” Future Adam demanded immediately.

“What the fuck are you doing here again?” Adam demanded right back.

“The date! Come on!”

“February 8, 2017.”

“Okay, good, let’s get down to business,” Future Adam said. He took the towel from Adam’s hand and wiped the shaving cream and blood off of his face before leading him to the bedroom. “Sit here,” Future Adam said, pointing to the bed.

“How are you getting here?” Adam asked, looking up at his future self. It was him alright - the same eyes, the same soft mouth, the same voice.

“There are developments in the future and I can get here,” Future Adam said, waving his hand dismissively. “I’m not allowed to tell you any more than that. I’m only allowed to give you the warning.”

“What _ warning_?” Adam said.

Future Adam rolled his eyes and sat down on the bed next to Adam. “_T__he warning_. We’ll get to that.”

“Do I ever win the Stanley Cup?” Adam demanded. Suddenly he realized that if this was him from the future, this person (or hologram?) knew how a lot of things turned out. He’d know if Adam ever earned that big contract, if he got to play until his late 30's like he always wanted to, and about the literal holy grail of Adams’ dreams, the Stanley Cup.

“I’m not allowed to tell you that. There are rules to this,” Future Adam said, pushing Adam back from where he’s leaning into his personal space in excitement. 

“C’mon, a hint!”

“No,” Future Adam says firmly. “No bending the rules or I can’t come back.”

Adam gasped suddenly. "Is this a test? Like a would-you-fuck-your-double situation?"

"Christ," Future Adam sighed, "I'm not going fuck you. What's _wrong_ with you?"

“So why are you here?”

“I’m here to warn you that _ you have to tell him how you feel before it’s too late_,” Future Adam said matter-of-factly, dropping his hands on his lap.

“Who?” Adam frowned.

Future Adam ran his hand through his hair, which Adam was relieved to see was still as thick at 40 as it was at 24. “I can’t tell you that. You have to figure it out for yourself.”

“Well, what good is that?” Adam shrieked. “And what’s ‘too late’?”

“I can’t tell you that either.”

“Some warning then,” Adam mumbled.

“Just keep your eyes open. He’ll be back on the roster and you’ll realize who he is sooner or later. Just try to make it sooner.”

"He’s on the team?”

“Oh shit,” Future Adam said, standing up and putting his hands on his hips. “Well, you didn’t hear that from me. Gotta go.”

“Are you leaving already?” Adam asked, feeling sad that he wasn't going to get anything more out of this guy, this older version of himself.

“Yeah, I’ll be back though. Keep your eyes open.” Future Adam started to shimmer around the edges.

“What do I do if I see him?” Adam shouted but Future Adam was gone, faded out of sight. 

***

The next day at morning skate, Adam slid up next to Mark to wait his turn during a shooting drill. “Hey,” he said, lifting his chin in greeting.

“Lows, how ya doing?” Mark said, his eyes on Blake as he shot.

“Sheifs, do you believe in time travel?” Adam asked, trying to keep his voice casual.

Mark turned to squint at him. “What, you’re getting high now?”

Adam chucked uncomfortably, fiddling with his stick and looking away from Mark. “I was just wondering if you think it could be real. Like, at some point do you think we’ll have the technology to travel into the past?” When he looked back at Mark, Mark was shaking his head in disbelief.

“I think you should focus on the present if you want to break ten goals this season,” Mark said before skating off for his turn at the drill.

“I have nine!” Adam shouted after him. 

Adam did score his tenth goal of the season two nights later in a loss against Chicago at home, but that didn’t settle his mind any. He couldn’t stop thinking about the latest visit and the warning - _ tell him how you feel before it’s too late_. Who was he talking about? There wasn’t anyone in Adam’s life and there hadn’t been for a few years. He didn’t date much because of his schedule and the constant travel, not to mention being in the public eye in Winnipeg. He had hooked up some on the road but barely remembered those guys’ names let alone had strong feelings for any of them. 

One thing he said during the last visit stuck with him - _ he’ll be back on the roster and you’ll realize who he is_. Before a game later that week, he looked around the dressing room and his eyes fell on Patrik. He had been out with an injury earlier in the month but surely he couldn’t be the person he was talking about. Patrik was a nice kid but odd. Not Adam’s type and definitely not a person that Adam could see himself developing feelings for any time soon. 

***

Adam started waking up in the middle of the night, haunted by fading memories of dreams about his future self. He was sleeping badly and playing worse. February in Winnipeg was gray and miserable, and the team set out on an extended road trip already feeling defeated. 

When he stepped onto the ice in Montreal for warm-ups, Adam was interested to see that Brandon was there, called up from the Moose for the second time that season. Adam hadn't gotten to know Brandon because he was still yoyo-ing between the Jets and the Moose. And even when he was up with the Jets, Brandon kept to himself or stuck with some other guys on the bubble like him. After the win that night in Montreal and another two road games, Brandon was sent back down and Adam forgot about him, all of his focus on the Jets' dwindling playoff hopes and the long off-season ahead. 

***

At the end of season party at a bar in Winnipeg in April 2017, Adam drank steadily, trying to wash the season away with tequila. His teammates were dancing but he was slumped at the bar, exhausted from the grind and already dreading packing up his condo for the drive home. He felt someone jostle his arm and looked over to see Brandon leaning over the bar to get the bartender’s attention. 

“Hey man,” Brandon said with an easy smile. His hair was sweaty around his temples from dancing and his eyes were bright. “Looking forward to summer?”

“Not really,” Adam grumbled into his drink. 

“I am,” Brandon said happily, not catching that Adam was in a foul mood and wasn’t receptive to his chatter. “I’m so psyched to put in the work this off-season. I think next year is gonna be my year.”

Adam threw back the rest of this drink, slammed his glass down, and rolled his eyes at Brandon. “Yeah? Over this year already?”

“Gotta look to the future, man,” Brandon said, taking his beer from the bartender and clasping Adam on the shoulder. “Think about yourself at 40. Wouldn’t that guy want you to really be motivated now?”

“What did you say?” Adam frowned at him through his tequila fog. _ Think about myself at 40? _

“I’m just saying you should be more positive,” Brandon said, taking a swig of his beer and heading back to the dance floor.

Adam watched Brandon dancing, surrounded by their teammates. Mark was doing some complicated footwork that he probably thought made him look cool and Buff was moshing with Nicolaj, sending Nicolaj flying across the dance floor in peels of laughter. Blake and Jacob were dragging Patrik onto the dance floor and trying to show him how to dance, even though they were terrible dancers themselves. 

And in the middle of it was Brandon. Mark leaned in to say something in his ear and Brandon threw his head back in delight, his smile the brightest thing Adam had ever seen. The light moved across his face, his strong shoulders visible in his tight t-shirt, and all Adam could think was: _Oh. _And in that moment, he was almost certain.

That’s him.

***

Future Adam reappeared at 4 am on November 1, 2017. Or, at least, that’s when Future Adam woke up Adam by turning on the tv and cranking up the volume.

“What the fuck, man,” Adam groaned, not even surprised anymore. “We didn’t get back from Minnesota until 2 am. I just got to sleep.”

“Listen, I don’t control the timing of this. The technology isn’t that precise.”

“How does it work anyway?” Adam said, sitting up in bed and rubbing his eyes. “Like, aren’t you worried that you’ll change something in the past and it’ll erase you in the future?”

Future Adam sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers. “That’s not...it’s not _ Back to the Future_. We’re not Michael J. Fox.”

“No, we’re like three feet taller than him. So how does it work?”

“You are _ not _smart enough at your age to understand the details of the multiverse.” 

“Wow, rude” Adam said. "What's the multi-whatever?"

“Let’s focus on what’s important,” Future Adam said, clapping his hands. “What’s the date?”

“November 1, 2017,” Adam grumbled.

“And?”

“And what?” Adam said, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“The warning, c’mon,” Future Adam said. 

Adam rolled his eyes. “I’m still stuck on who _ he _is.”

“Christ, was I always this dumb?” Future Adam said, getting up to pace across the bedroom. “Think about it.”

“I mean, there’s Brandon, he’s pretty great.”

Future Adam turned to look at him with interest. “Say more about that.”

“We’re on a line together and we’re doing pretty good,” Adam shrugged. “He makes me these cookies that I like, with this white chocolate drizzle.”

“Oh my god, the cookies,” Future Adam moaned. It was a little like a sex moan. 

_ Is that what I sound like during sex? _ Adam thought for a second in a panic. “You remember the cookies?”

“I really miss those cookies,” Future Adam said. He looked sad and wistful.

“So what am I supposed to tell him?” Adam said, scooching back down under the covers. He was feeling sleepy, future self or no future self in his bedroom.

“You have to figure that out yourself. But remember-”

“Before it’s too late, I know,” Adam said as his eyes grew heavy. “Sounds like some bullshit to me.”

Suddenly, Future Adam was on him, grabbing his shoulders and shaking him. “It’s not! It’s really serious! One day he’ll be gone and you’ll regret not taking me seriously.” 

Adam stared at his future self, the way those familiar eyes were burning out of his older face, looking desperate and a little scared. “Gone?” he whispered. Adam had been so focused on who the _ he _ in the warning was and what he was supposed to tell him that he didn’t think about the last bit - that there was going to be a time when _ he _ was _ gone _ and it would be too late. What did that mean? Because, to Adam, it sounded like _ he_, whoever he was, was going to die.

Future Adam reeled back, like he had said too much. “I’ve gotta go,” he said quickly as he made for the door.

“Wait!” Adam shouted after him.

“I’ll be back,” Future Adam said, his voice already growing faint as he shimmered out of sight.

“Shit,” Adam said to himself into the dim bedroom. 

***

Adam watched Brandon closely the rest of the season, the careful way he prepared for games, the way he worked out like a beast on off-days, the way he was kind to everyone on the team, even when everyone was grumpy at the end of a bad roadie. Brandon’s condo was close to Adam’s and they spent more and more time together, riding to practice together most mornings and grabbing lunch together most days after. Adam was comfortable with Brandon. He loved the way that Brandon would whip up a batch of muffins in the afternoon while Adam napped on the couch, waking him up with a cup of tea and a smile. 

The team started thinking of Adam and Brandon as a duo, as a package deal. Should we invite Adam and Brandon? Where are Adam and Brandon? Adam liked that. It made him feel grounded, like he was part of a family. Like he was permanent. 

Despite how warm and happy Brandon made him feel, Adam still couldn’t figure out what that meant. When Blake cornered Adam one night and asked him what was going on between them, his tone all stern and captain-y, Adam could only shrug in response. He knew that his stomach felt funny when Brandon flirted with the waiter at the bar the team regularly went to after home games. He didn’t like seeing Brandon looking at that guy with his eyes like that, with that smile that Adam didn’t think that guy deserved. Adam wanted Brandon to smile at him like that. But beyond that, Adam wasn’t sure of anything - if Brandon was the person he was supposed to be looking out for, what was supposed to do before it was too late? 

***

Toward the end of the playoffs in April 2018, on an off-day during what he was sure would be their last series, Adam got drunk at home by himself and tried to summon his future self for help. He sat in his living room with the lights turned low and started in on the good rye that his brother had given him for Christmas, sipping it slowly and then gulping it down. By the time it was dark out, he was pretty buzzed and felt brave enough to shout into the room, bellowing, “Come back here, you! I need help! Adam! Come back!”

He waited a moment but there was no loud noise, no shimmer and no Future Adam. He put his head in his hands and took a deep breath before shouting again. “Adam! Come back! Adam!”

Suddenly, there was a knock on the front door. Adam rushed to it and threw it open, certain that Future Adam would be standing there, ready to help him out. But instead, it was Brandon, holding a tray of muffins.

“Hi!” Brandon said and then frowned when he saw the look on Adam’s face. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Adam said, backing out of the doorway and returning to the couch.

“Are you here by yourself?” Brandon asked. He put the muffins on the counter in the kitchen. “I thought I heard shouting.”

“That was the tv.”

Brandon came to stand by the couch and stared at the television, which was off. “And you’re drinking by yourself? Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Do you want one?” Adam said, waving his glass at Brandon. 

“Sure,” Brandon said. He picked up a tumbler off of the shelf and sat down next to Adam, who poured him a generous drink.

“Do you believe in time travel?”

Brandon choked a little on his first sip. “Like _ Back to the Future_?”

“Yeah,” Adam said, turning in his seat to look at Brandon, “but if you go into the past, that’d change the future, right?”

“Sure, that’s why Michael J. Fox started fading out when his parents didn’t get together. You can change your own future.”

Adam slapped his hand down on the coffee table in excitement. “That’s what I said!”

Brandon looked confused. “How many of these have you had?”

“Did you make me muffins?” Adam asked. He got up from the couch and went over to take a big bite of one. They had a brown sugar streusel topping and he couldn’t help but moan at how good they were. _ Oh shit_, Adam thought as he chewed and tried to swallow the bite of muffin in his mouth. He suddenly remembered the sound that Future Adam had made about Brandon’s cookies, the longing in that moan. Had that same sound just come out of his mouth?

Brandon came over and placed his hand on Adam’s shoulder. “How ‘bout we get you some water, big guy?” He went to the fridge and came back with a bottle of water, which he opened and pushed into Adam’s hand. “Drink this.”

Adam took a sip and then looked at Brandon - really looked at him. He looked so soft in his gray hoodie, his hair a little rumpled and his eyes warm. He was gently resting his hand on Adam’s arm and looking up at him with a concerned look on his face. He had brought Adam muffins. He was looking after him. 

Adam’s head was swimming with the alcohol and the smell of Brandon’s aftershave and the muffins. Before he could think about it, he leaned in to kiss Brandon softly on the lips. 

Brandon froze for a minute and then put his hand on Adam’s chest. “Adam,” he started.

“I’m sorry,” Adam said automatically. “I wasn’t thinking, I shouldn’t have-”

“I’m seeing someone,” Brandon blurted out. He immediately looked like wished he could take it back.

“Oh,” Adam said, feeling stupid. _The bartender_.

“Yeah, it’s early days so I didn’t say anything,” he said quietly. They stood there in the kitchen, uncomfortably close together, and then moved away from each other. “Well, if you’re okay here, I’ll just get going.”

“Yeah,” Adam said. He felt embarrassed and too drunk all of a sudden. He watched Brandon give him a quick wave and leave the condo before collapsing on the couch. Before he fell asleep, he thought about the warning. _ Tell him how you feel before it’s too late. _If the warning was about Brandon, maybe he was already too late.

***

Adam went home that summer and tried not to think about his future self, or Brandon, or the guy Brandon was seeing. He stalked Brandon’s Instagram for signs of the guy, desperate to see who he tagged in his photos from days out on the lake or on the golf course or on vacation in Mexico. Adam even checked Brandon’s brother’s Instagram to see if the guy would show up in the background of one of Chris’s pics before Adam became so disgusted with himself that he deleted Instagram from his phone entirely.

Adam moved back to Winnipeg at the end of August 2018 and resolved to be less codependent with Brandon that year. He was still on a line with Brandon though, and they were still lumped together by their teammates, who had no idea of the awkwardness that Adam had created. Adam still ended up next to Brandon the plane, at the bar on nights out, in the backs of cabs on the way back to the hotel on the road. 

***

One night in mid-November 2018, Brandon showed up at his house with a box of baking supplies. “Can I come in?” he asked on Adam’s doorstep, looking hopeful.

“Sure,” Adam shrugged, swinging the door open to let him in.

“I feel like I haven’t seen you much this season,” Brandon said. He set his box down on the counter and started unpacking the ingredients. 

“I’m sure you’ve been busy with what’s-his-name,” Adam said, his back to Brandon.

“Oh,” Brandon laughed quietly. “We broke up, so.” 

Adam turned slowly to look at Brandon, who had his head bent over a mixing bowl while he measured flour into a sifter. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” Brandon said, his voice light. “Not easy to date someone who doesn’t understand the life, you know?” He looked over at Adam, who was standing stock still across the kitchen. “Gotta date a hockey player next time I guess,” he said, a small smile on his lips.

Instead of reacting to that, Adam cleared his throat and changed the subject. “Do we need milk?” 

That day, they spent the rest of the afternoon focused on the recipe, moving around the kitchen together quietly until the cookies were in the oven. They went on like that, avoiding what had happened between them and just coexisting as they always had. As the weeks went by, Adam let himself fall back into Brandon’s orbit, not thinking of the warning or his future self, just enjoying the warmth of Brandon next to him every day.

***

Future Adam reappeared on January 5, 2019, shimmering into the passenger seat of Adam’s car as he drove home from the arena after a game. 

“You’re lucky that wasn’t the first time or I would have driven off the road,” Adam chided him as the pulled into his parking space at his condo. 

“You’re lucky I didn’t materialize an hour earlier in the locker room,” Future Adam said with a quirk of his eyebrow.

“Can other people see you?” Adam asked.

“Why are you so fascinated by the mechanics of this?” Future Adam said as he climbed out of the car. “Where are you with Brandon?”

“We’re bros, man, I don’t know!” Adam got out of the car and slammed the door shut in frustration.

“You’re not _ bros_,” Future Adam came around the car to punch Adam in the shoulder. “You kissed him!”

“He didn’t like it,” Adam said, rubbing his shoulder. He was still strong at 40, damn.

“He never said that he didn't like it. He said he had a boyfriend, remember?” Future Adam said, crossing his arms. “Do you want to kiss him again?”

Adam slumped against the car door. “Yes,” he sighed. “But I feel so stupid after last time.”

“And _ I’m _telling you to man up and tell him how you feel.”

“I don't how I feel,” Adam said.

Future Adam shook his head in exasperation. “I know you don’t know how to articulate your emotions at this point in our life, but you’ve gotta figure that one out _ real fast_.”

“Yeah, before it’s too late. I know,” Adam sighed.

“I don’t think you do,” Future Adam said, already shimmering around the edges. “You have no sense of urgency.”

“Well, if _ someone _ wasn’t so _ goddamn cryptic _ maybe I could figure it out!” Adam shouted into the dark where his future self had been a minute ago. “Dammit.”

***

Adam spent a lot of time trying to figure out his feelings for Brandon. He watched Brandon closely, following the way the skated gracefully during warm-ups and the way the muscles in his back flexed while he dried off after his shower. He decided that he wanted Brandon to watch him too, to wonder what his lips tasted like, to think about him at night before he fell asleep like Adam did.

At the end of January 2019, during a game in Boston, Kevin Miller laid a hit on Brandon and Adam lost his goddamn mind, launching himself immediately at Miller and pummeling him with his fists until Buff pulled him off. As he skated to the penalty box, still cursing out Miller who was being held back by a ref, he saw his teammates looking at him, appalled. But Brandon was looking at him too, a little like he was impressed that Adam fought for him and a little like he wanted to eat Adam alive. Adam stared back, licking the blood off his lips and watched Brandon’s eyes widen with desire.

***

Adam invited Brandon to go to Arizona with him during the All Star break and took him hiking up Camelback Mountain. It was hot and they were both shirtless, Adam watching the sweat drip down the back of Brandon’s neck as he hiked behind him on the trail. Adam wanted to taste Brandon’s sweat as his kissed his neck and to touch Brandon's chest, his skin warm from the sun, the muscles hard under his fingers.

That night, they grilled steaks on the patio outside the AirBnb they rented for the week and then moved to the fire pit to drink beer. Adam wanted Brandon so badly that he finally made his move. He scooted his chair closer to Brandon’s, touching their forearms together, and leaned close. He brushed their fingers together and watched the small hairs on Brandon’s arm go up in goosebumps and then, finally, before he lost his nerve, he leaned in to kiss Brandon. 

When he pulled back, Brandon was looking at him with big eyes. “Adam, what are you-”

“I’m acting with a sense of urgency,” Adam said, leaning back in to kiss Brandon again and feeling Brandon melt under his lips. Adam reached out to trace Brandon's jaw with his fingers. "Is this okay?" 

Brandon nodded wordlessly.

"C'mere," Adam said, taking Brandon's hand and pulling him toward him. Brandon settled on his lap, still looking a little struck. "Is this okay?" Adam whispered and kissed Brandon, his hands firm on Brandon's back. Brandon squirmed a little on his lap, his breath catching as Adam bit at his lower lip. Adam slid his hands down to squeeze Brandon's ass and kissed down his neck. "What about this?" Adam said. 

Brandon arched his back as Adam licked down his neck. "Stop asking questions," he gasped, clinging to Adam's shoulders. "Unless the question is should we go upstairs and then the answer is yes."

“Really?” Adam pulled back to look at Brandon, whose eyes were heavy. There was a soft smile on his face and he bit his lip seductively as he stood up and took Adam’s hand.

“Yeah, come on,” Brandon said. Adam followed him inside and upstairs, letting Brandon lead him to his bedroom and onto his bed. Adam crawled up the bed toward Brandon and kissed him there, pressing his body down onto Brandon’s, taut underneath him. 

“Is this just a vacation thing,” Adam asked when he sat up on his knees to take his shirt off. 

Brandon sat up to take his shirt off too and leaned forward to kiss across Adam’s shoulders. “It’s a whatever-we-want thing. I just know I should have kissed you back last year. I should have broken up with Kayden and really kissed you.”

“His name was _ Kayden_?” Adam shrieked, pushing Brandon back by the shoulders. “You chose a guy named Kayden over me?”

Brandon opened his mouth to protest and then closed it with a rueful smile. “Not my best decision, okay? Don’t rub it in.”

Adam laughed and kissed Brandon again, leaning over him and pressing his hips down onto him. “I’m gonna make you forget all about that guy,” Adam said, biting his way down Brandon’s chest and looking up once he reached his waist. 

“Promise?” Brandon asked, biting his lip as Adam started inching his pants down his hips.

***

That night, Adam learned one very important thing about Brandon: he was loud in bed. Adam had been with guys who were so quiet in bed that he couldn’t tell if they were even enjoying what he was doing to them. Not Brandon, who moaned with appreciation at every movement of Adam’s tongue on his cock and who told Adam exactly how much he wanted to come for him. His mouth was filthy and Adam couldn't get enough of the things Brandon whispered in his ear as he fingered him. Between that and Brandon's body, all wiry muscle and an ass that Adam couldn't keep his hands off of, Adam wasn't sure he could ever get enough of him. 

And Brandon's face, the look on his face when he came was the hottest thing Adam had ever seen. Adam jerked him off fast and tight and watched Brandon, the soft whimpers falling from his lips as he looked up at Adam like he was his whole world. Adam couldn’t get enough of that look, didn't even care about getting his as long as he could watch Brandon and his pleading eyes, his body moving uncontrollably as he came. He wanted to make Brandon look at him like that over and over again forever. 

***

One morning at home before morning skate, Adam pulled back the shower curtain to see Future Adam standing there with his bath towel in his hand.

“Date?” he asked, tossing Adam the towel.

Adam rolled his eyes and then smiled at his future self. “March 30, 2019.”

“Alright,” Future Adam clapped his hands together. “So it’s on, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Adam smiled, thinking about Brandon coming home with him after that night’s game to hook up like he did most nights. 

“Okay, so have you told him? You know, that you…” Future Adam gestured vaguely toward Adam. 

“That I like fucking him?” Adam asked, pushing past Future Adam into his bedroom to get dressed.

“C’mon man, try to see past his ass and think about how you feel about him. It’s more than just a physical thing and you know it. He’s talked about next year, right?”

“Yeah,” Adam said, pulling on track pants and rooting around in his drawer for a t-shirt. “I told him not to worry because he’ll get signed somewhere.”

“You _ idiot_, he wants you to tell him that you hope he gets signed here!” Future Adam shouted. “He _ really _ likes you.”

“He keeps saying that this is just a hookup,” Adam said, walking to the kitchen to prepare a travel mug of coffee.

Future Adam trailed behind, close at his heels. “Because you’re acting like you don’t give a shit if he leaves! You have to tell him how you feel!” 

“I don’t know how I feel, okay?” Adam shouted. “I’m scared and you’re making it worse!”

“Listen to me,” Future Adam said, grabbing Adam by the front of his shirt and getting right in his face. “You think you’re scared now? Just imagine how scared you’re going to feel when he’s _ gone _ and you never told him how you feel. That kind of fear will keep you up at night, for years.” Future Adam let go of him and walked out of the room. 

Adam heard the front door open and slam shut. When he looked out the front window, Future Adam was gone.

***

Adam didn’t say anything to Brandon that day, or the day after. He was paralyzed by his own fear that Brandon didn't feel the same way that he did. He was starting to realize that the feeling when he was in bed with Brandon - the one where he felt like his heart was going to explode out of his chest as he looked in Brandon's eyes - was love. But the thought of telling Brandon how he felt and being rejected by Brandon a second time was unbearable. 

When the season was well and truly dead, Adam helped Brandon pack up his truck and stood next to it while Brandon said that he’d let him know about his contract. Adam let everything between them hang unsaid and just watched as Brandon drove away.

Adam spent weeks by himself at his cabin by the lake, not answering his family’s calls or responding to texts from Mark. Most nights he stayed up until dawn, his stomach churning in fear about what was going to happen. His future self seemed so afraid and desperate, repeatedly saying that Brandon was going to be gone soon. Adam couldn’t stop playing out scenarios in his mind about what _ gone _ could mean to inspire such fear in his future self. He couldn’t stop imagining horrible things - a car crash or a boating accident, police sirens, Brandon broken in a hospital bed, Brandon truly gone.

At the end of June 2019, after one particularly sleepless night, he got in his truck and drove back toward Calgary and straight to the airport. He paid a ridiculous price for a last minute flight to Toronto and boarded the plane.

***

Brandon opened the door to the off-season apartment he shared in Toronto with his brother, a look of confusion on his face. “Adam? I didn’t know you were coming. Why didn’t you call?”

“I just...I had to see you,” Adam said, stepping close to Brandon and tipping his chin up to look at his face.

“Yeah?” Brandon said, breathless as he looked up at Adam and Adam leaned down to kiss him. Brandon snaked his arms around Adam’s waist to pull them him close. “Wanna come inside?”

“Yes,” Adam said, not taking his eyes off Brandon. He walked Brandon backward into the apartment and picked him up, kissing him as Brandon’s legs came around his waist. Adam kicked the door shut behind him and carried Brandon down the hallway to where he thought Brandon’s bedroom would be. 

“Adam,” Brandon laughed as Adam laid him down on the bed. “What’s gotten into you?”

Adam stood up to take off his shirt and leaned back over Brandon, pushing his shirt up his stomach and kissing there, eyes on Brandon’s face as his eyes fluttered shut. “I shouldn’t have let you come to Toronto.”

“What?” Brandon said, lifting his head.

“I should have taken you to Calgary with me,” Adam said, surging up to kiss him. “You should be with me.”

Brandon kissed him back frantically, hands grasping at Adam’s back as they kissed deeper and deeper. “But what about next year-”

“I don't know how we'll do it, but you belong with me,” Adam murmured into Brandon’s neck, where he was sucking a mark. Brandon groaned in response to the pressure, his back arching into Adam. “It's always been you and me.” 

“Adam,” Brandon moaned, watching with big eyes as Adam stripped his pants off and worked a hand inside his boxers. 

“Tell me I’m right,” Adam said as he wrapped his hand around Brandon, already hard for him.

“Fuck,” Brandon groaned, “yes.” Brandon’s head was back and he was moving his hips up into Adam’s hand. Adam tugged Brandon’s boxers down so he could get his mouth around his cock, taking it down hungrily and enjoying the sounds Brandon was making has he raked his tongue up and down. “I've wanted you for so long.”

Adam tongued over Brandon’s balls, holding him down by the hips so he wouldn’t buck up into his face. “Me too, baby, so fucking long,” he said as he spread Brandon’s legs apart and licked lower. As Brandon opened up for him, his moans getting breathier the closer Adam got to fucking him, Adam thought about how long it had taken him to get to this point, to really tell Brandon how he felt. His future self had been warning him all along and he hadn't listened, or hadn't understood until it was almost too late. 

That night, and every night for the next week, Adam fell asleep curled around Brandon. Before he fell asleep each night, Brandon would pull Adam’s arms closer around him and whisper, “Don’t go.” Adam would bury his face in Brandon’s hair and try to breathe, overwhelmed with how much he wanted Brandon and how, if his future self was right, it would all come to an end and Brandon had no idea. 

***

On June 30, 2019, Brandon and Adam woke early and, after breakfast smoothies and making out in the shower, went to the gym to work out. They played nine holes of golf and had lunch near the apartment, returning for a late afternoon nap. That night, they went out for dinner at a quiet bistro, shared a bottle of wine, and walked home hand-in-hand.

Despite the relaxing day, Adam was feeling unsettled and a little anxious. The time he spent with Brandon was the happiest of his life but he couldn’t help but fear that it was all slipping away from him too fast. In bed that night, he couldn’t stop holding Brandon close and kissing him as slowly undressed him, desperate to remember every inch of his body. 

He laid with Brandon spooned in front of him, Brandon’s upper body turned to kiss him. Adam held Brandon’s top leg up under the knee so he could fuck into Brandon over and over again. He cradled Brandon’s head and watched Brandon's face as he cried out in pleasure, stretched around Adam buried tight inside him. Brandon felt so good and all Adam could do was bury his face in Brandon’s neck and talk him to him as he fell apart. 

“Adam, please,” Brandon begged when Adam slowed down, dragging himself excruciatingly slowly in and out of Brandon. He could feel Brandon shaking, desperate to come, and he wanted to play this out a little longer. 

“You’re so good for me,” Adam soothed him, kissing the side of his face, “look at you taking it so good for me.”

"Oh god," Brandon gasped.

“Do you want it harder?” Adam whispered in his ear. 

Brandon nodded frantically. “Please Adam,” Brandon cried. He arched back to fuck himself on Adam and started to tighten around him. 

Adam gripped his thigh harder, spreading him open even more so he could go deeper. He held Brandon tight against him as he fucked into him faster, faster. Brandon reached down to touch himself, stroking his cock, his loud moans spurring Adam on. 

“Fuck, baby,” Adam groaned, “I love you so much.” Adam couldn’t stop now, couldn’t slow down. All he wanted was to come with Brandon, to kiss him until the world fell down around them, to never stop. 

“I love you, god, I love you,” Brandon cried out as he started coming, pulling Adam into a kiss and over the edge with him. 

***

Adam padded out to the kitchen early the next morning to get a drink of water. He left Brandon sleeping sweetly in bed and looked forward to cuddling with him until they had to get up to go to the gym. As he swung the door to the fridge closed, he heard a loud crack and Future Adam shimmered into sight in the kitchen. 

“Hey,” Adam smiled.

“I know that look,” Future Adam smiled back. “Oh good, we’re at Brandon’s. Did you tell him?”

“Yeah, and he said I love you back,” Adam said shyly. “I think we’ve finally figured it out.”

“What’s the date?”

“July 1st.”

“Just in the nick of time,” Future Adam said and then quickly ducked behind the kitchen island as Brandon came into the room.

“Adam? Is someone here?” Brandon said, rubbing his eyes sleepily and looking unhappy.

“No, just me,” Adam said. He put his arms around Brandon’s waist and kissed him softly on the lips before he noticed that he was holding his phone. “Did someone call?” he asked, a pit dropping in his stomach.

“It was my agent,” Brandon said. He paused and looked like he was going to be sick. “It’s Pittsburgh. A six year deal, a lot of money.”

“Babe,” Adam said softly, taking Brandon’s face in his hands and brushing their noses together. “You should take it. We’ll make it work.”

“Yeah?” A smile slid onto Brandon's face.

Adam cupped his face in his hands and kissed him. "It's you and me, Bran."

“You mean it? Even though I’ll be gone?”

_ Gone_. The word set alarm bells ringing in Adam’s head. He managed to smile and nod before sending Brandon off to call his agent to accept. 

When Brandon left the room, Adam bent down next to the kitchen island and pulled Future Adam to his feet. “_Gone _ is Pittsburgh? I thought he was going to _ die_,” Adam hissed. 

“Technically, I never said he was going to die,” Future Adam said, backing away as Adam advanced on him. “I just needed you to take me seriously and you filled in the blanks.”

“I’m going to kill you,” Adam grabbed him and shook his shoulders before letting him go. “Although I guess it’s thanks to you that we figured this out before he was across the continent.”

“Yeah, I’ve seen that timeline and it isn’t so great for either of you.”

“So does it work out in my timeline? Can you tell me, now that it’s over?” Adam asked, feeling simultaneously relieved and worried about the future.

Future Adam sighed. “Since is the last visit, I can give you a little hint. Close your eyes.” He reached out, current and future versions of the same man reaching out to touch hands.

Adam closed his eyes and, right as their hands touched, a hundred images flashed before his eyes. They came so quickly that Adam could only catch a few. Brandon across the ice from him in a Penguins uniform during warm-ups. Brandon jumping into his arms in the airport in Winnipeg. Brandon carrying the Stanley Cup into their house on a sunny afternoon. Brandon in a tux holding his hand on their wedding day. Brandon kissing him on the lake with the sun setting behind him. Brandon in the stands with Adam's family when they retired his number. Brandon asleep on their couch holding the twins, their tiny bodies in their matching pink blankets from the hospital.

In an instant, Adam’s eyes snapped open. Future Adam was gone and the kitchen was empty. He still was awestruck at what he had seen, all the promise of his future with Brandon, when Brandon walked back into the kitchen. Adam pulled him into a hug, burying his head in Brandon’s neck and trying to hold back the tears he felt welling up. 

“Hey, it’ll be okay,” Brandon said, smoothing his hand over Adam’s hair. "We'll travel, we'll have summers and the All Star break. We’ll work it out, right? ”

Adam leaned back to look at Brandon. His eyes were bright and Adam didn’t ever want to look away from him. “You bet we will."

**Author's Note:**

> Comments very welcome!


End file.
